Gameweek 18 Preview

Old Headingley’s Guardian Angell provides this weekend’s preview…

Emotions are gathering pace as we approach a weekend tainted with huge sentiment. As such, my words this week are more of appeal, than preview. For the record, here are the fixtures:

Swillington Saints Vs OHAFC (WYAFL Div 1)

Form Guide: WLLLL WLLDL

Last Meeting: n/a

On any normal day I’d say this would be another disappointing draw, with OHAFC’s stumbling form and various work xmas parties marring another Saturday.

OHAFC Reserves Vs Beeston St Anthony’s Reserves (Alliance Div 1)

Form Guide: DLDLD WWWWL

Last meeting: Beeston St Anthony’s Reserves 2-2 OHAFC Reserves 18/04/11
(Grant x 2)

On any normal day I’d say the Reserves could well take a battering…

BUT…

This is no usual Saturday. 3 of the OHAFC mainstays, both on and off the pitch, will wave farewell to the club this weekend, and if ever there was a time for both teams to sort themselves out and pull a winning performance out the bag, this is it.

Richie Harwood was one of the first players that stood out for me at Old Headingley. Looking like a complete weirdo carrying a deck chair and a broken hand, I arrived at a pitch in Bradford a few seasons back to watch my mate Finchy play for the OHAFC ressies. Despite managers Brown and Notman orchestrating a 2-0 victory, it wasn’t the greatest game and my actual comments to Finchy were: “no-one stood out for me, apart from the captain in centre mid.” Little did I know, that just over a year later that captain would be staining my bath with his fake tan, having ‘artistic disagreements’ with my missus over his make-up and having tantrums when he couldn’t decide between pink or yellow leg warmers; all this in preparation for being the better half of ‘Super Diva Fever.’ Since then I’ve got to know Richie well- casually necking 2 litres of vodka with him and Pickup at lunchtime on our Magaluf balcony certainly helped the bond- and you simply can’t dislike anything about the bloke. He never missed a social, rarely missed a training session and consistently performed on the pitch; Harwood is a true example to any OHAFC associate. Luckily for him, his one-on-one conversion rate is better off the pitch than on it… So you have been warned- keep him away from your sisters!!

My first real interaction with Thomas Monkhouse came out of desperation. “Monks, I never go on nights like this, make sure you look after me!” came the plea from my EfeSodjified face as we stood side-by-side at the urinal in Trio. We were emptying ourselves one last time on an OHAFC Otley run before heading to Basics with Eddie K, Bridger and Gav J. Later, as I announced to Monks my exit from the club at 5am, I knew that the soft, tender kiss goodbye we shared would not be the last, and indeed I was right- although quite how right I was will not be discussed further here! When I left FC Headingley, I really didn’t think it would be possible to join a gayer club. I was wrong, and if I ever needed this reaffirming, I’d just hang out with Monks for a bit. Despite this however, no lady was ever safe on a night out with Monkey, and his post-night-out stories never failed to amuse, often including expressions such as ‘hideous’, ‘disgusting’ and ‘absolute munter.’ I think it would be fair to say that this man can already be considered an OHAFC legend, and aside from the endless off-the-pitch antics, his contributions on the pitch have been invaluable- a quality footballer and motivator, a man who cares about the club and plays with his heart. Mercifully we can expect a return next season, but right now that seems a long way away.

Chris Burns- really? Do I really need to say anything about this man and what he has done for this club? Thought not. Even beginning to write about what he has done for OHAFC, is an impossible task, so I won’t start a list because it would be endless. Quite simply, he is to Old Headingley what Shankley is to Liverpool, what Fergie is to Man United, what Nicholson is to Spurs, what Shearer is to Newcastle, what Delia is to Norwich… So this Saturday lads, for Burnsy, LET’S BE AVIN’ YOU…!!!

I don’t want to have to report that these lads were not given the send-off they deserve. So if you are an OHAFC player reading this, I implore you to aspire to excellence like never before this weekend. Go into every tackle, win every header and take every chance as if it was the last game of football you will ever play. Do it for the lads. Do it for your mates.

I really don’t care about the scores this week, as long as they are both WINS. Then let’s follow this with a night out involving more booze, banter, singing, dancing, manlove and bodily fluids than even Eddie K can handle.

Who’s with me?